From: R & S Scarcella & Family [inbox@webpastor.com] Sent: Thursday, 22 February 2001 11:55 PM To: hitsters@webpastor.com Subject: WEBPASTOR Weekly Hits! 2001 Vol 2. No.4 =================================================== YOUR WEBPASTOR WEEKLY HITS! - FREE NETMAGAZINE =================================================== distributed by Rev. Rocco & Mrs. Susan Scarcella from Church of the Good Shepherd Bossley Park NSW Australia WEBSITE: www.webpastor.com ITEMS, JOKES ETC TO: hits@webpastor.com SUBSCRIBE: subscribe@webpastor.com UNSUBSCRIBE: unsubscribe@webpastor.com (Please write "no hits" in the subject frame) HITS! ARCHIVES: Go to... http://www.webpastor.com/hits/index.htm WHAT IS CHRISTIANITY?: Go to... http://www.christianity.net.au HELP BLIMBINGSARI ORPHANAGE?: Go to... http://www.webpastor.com/miss&supp.htm LIKE YOUR OWN FREE EMAIL ADDRESS & MORE? Go to... http://www.webpastor.com/free-mail.htm *************************************************** Dear NetFamily, We heard a story this morning that a man in Nebraska is trying to offload his radio station in a type of ballot. One thousand people pay $1000 for the privilege of being in the draw. The winner wins the station. So, what would you do with a radio station? We know what we would do! But more importantly, what are we all doing with what we have now? READING FROM THE WORD OF GOD "Again, it (the Kingdom of God) will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his property to them. To one he gave five talents of money, to another two talents, and to another one talent, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey.The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. So also, the one with the two talents gained two more. But the man who had received the one talent went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master's money. After a long time the master of those servants returned and settled accounts with them.... Matthew 25: 14,15,17,18 (NIV) Did you know that our English word "talent" actually comes from this story in the Bible where "talent" refers to a coin called a talent? Do you know someone with talent? Do you ever wish you had talent? Guess what? God says here that we all have it. We are all given something by God, some part of his nature that He gives to us to further the cause of His kingdom. Some may be given much, and much is required from them. But even those who only have a little (and that is by far most of us!) have a responsibility to use that talent to the glory of God. In the end of this parable, Jesus makes it clear that if our talents are not used for God, they will be taken from us, and we will be the losers, for ever and ever. Think about it. What has God given you? Don't say, "If only I had this or that..." Use what God has given you now. TESTIMONY "I'm a Christian today, because a man would not stop praying for me. I was born with a passion to sing and sang and wrote and thought about death until I nearly died. I searched for answers in drugs, men, and in the entertainment world. All I found was trouble. I was out of control. But all those years there was a man I had never met who kept praying for me. He knew my mother. He told me years later that there were nights when he would wake up and pray for me till sweat ran down his face. Finally, alone on a back porch I heard the gentle loving voice of the Holy Spirit calling me to the Father. I called the man who had prayed for me that night..and I gave my life to Jesus. He changed my life completely." Tammie. PRAYER POINTS *Thank the Lord that He is a God who gives of Himself, that He gives us His time(in prayer) His treasure(Jesus) and His talent(the abilities we have). *Thank the Lord if you live in a country where the Gospel can be shared without fear of reprisal. Pray for our brothers and sisters who do not have that privilege. *Keep Roger and little Amelia in your ongoing prayers. *Pray for countries where natural disasters have taken a big toll in human life. *Pray for those with marriage difficulties, that God will give then relief from their struggles. *Pray for all of us to use the talents that God has given us,in His service. *Pray for revival in our nations - beginning with each one of us! HAHAHA CORNER ***Hymns The Dentist's Hymn:......Crown Him With Many Crowns The Weatherman's Hymn....There shall be showers of Blessing The Contractor's Hymn....The Church's One Foundation The Tailor's Hymn........Holy,Holy, Holy The Golfer's Hymn........There is A Green Hill Far Away The Politician's Hymn....Standing on the Promises The Optometrist's Hymn...Open My Eyes That I Might See The IRS Agent's Hymn.....I Surrender All The Gossip's Hymn........Pass It On The Electrician's Hymn...Send the Light The Shopper's Hymn.......Sweet By and By The Realtor's Hymn........I've got a mansion, just over the hilltop --submitted by Pat C ***New Work Slogans The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed them. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat. If at first you don't succeed, try management. Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. Hang in there: Retirement is only 30 years away! Work: It isn't just for sleeping anymore. There are two kinds of people in life: people who like their jobs, and people who don't work here anymore. -Anon. ***(For all you musicians out there) How To Sing The Blues 1. Most blues begin "woke up this morning." 2. "I got a good woman" is a bad way to begin the blues, unless you stick something nasty in the next line. I got a good woman, with the meanest dog in town. 3. Blues are simple. After you have the first line right, repeat it. Then find something that rhymes. Sort of. Got a good woman with the meanest dog in town. He got teeth like Margaret Thatcher and he weighs `bout 500 pounds. 4. The blues are not about limitless choice. 5. Blues cars are Chevies and Cadillacs. Other acceptable blues transportation is Greyhound bus or a southbound train. Walkin' plays a major part in the blues lifestyle. So does "fixin' to die". 6. Teenagers can't sing the blues. Adults sing the blues. Blues adulthood means old enough to get the electric chair if you shoot a man in Memphis. 7. You can have the blues in New York City, but not in Brooklyn or Queens. Hard times in Vermont or North Dakota are just a depression. Chicago, St. Louis and Kansas City are still the best places to have the blues. 8. The following colors do not belong in the blues: a. violet b. beige c. mauve 9. You can't have the blues in an office or a shopping mall. The lighting is wrong. 10. Good places for the Blues: a. the highway b. the jailhouse c. the empty bed Bad places: a. Ashrams b. Gallery openings c. weekend in the Rocky Mountains --Anon. ***(and some erudition) "Ode to the Spell Checker!" Eye halve a spelling chequer It came with my pea sea It plainly marques four my revue Miss steaks eye kin knot sea. Eye strike a key and type a word And weight four it two say Weather eye am wrong oar write It shows me strait a weigh. As soon as a mist ache is maid It nose bee fore two long And eye can put the error rite Its rare lea ever wrong. Eye have run this poem threw it I am shore your pleased two no Its letter perfect awl the weigh My chequer tolled me sew. --submitted by Joanne B. ============================= Sioux: Well, eye thick that's awl four this weak, Rocko. Rocko: Sioux, pleas run that spell chequer again! Buy! Rocko and Sioux. ================================