From: R & S Scarcella & Family [inbox@webpastor.com] Sent: Friday, 21 July 2000 12:26 AM To: Susan Scarcella Subject: CoGS Weekly Hits! Vol. 7 No. 3 =================================================== YOUR CoGS WEEKLY HITS! - FREE NETMAGAZINE =================================================== distributed by Rev. Rocco & Mrs. Susan Scarcella from Church of the Good Shepherd Bossley Park NSW Australia WEBSITE: www.webpastor.com ITEMS, JOKES ETC TO: hits@webpastor.com SUBSCRIBE: subscribe@webpastor.com UNSUBSCRIBE: unsubscribe@webpastor.com (Please write "no hits" in the subject frame) WHAT IS CHRISTIANITY?: Go to... http://www.christianity.net.au HELP BLIMBINGSARI ORPHANAGE?: Go to... http://www.webpastor.com/miss&supp.htm *************************************************** Dear Netsters, We're back! You know how holidays are: you need one when you get back from one! LOL Now, on with the show... READING FROM THE WORD OF GOD By the rivers of Babylon we sat and wept when we remembered Zion. There on the poplars we hung our harps, for there our captors asked us for songs, our tormentors demanded songs of joy;they said, "Sing us one of the songs of Zion!" How can we sing the songs of the Lord while in a foreign land?" Psalm 137 1-4 (NIV) This psalm was written when the people of Israel had been taken into exile in Bablyon, their cities destroyed, and their capital levelled. There was precious little to be happy about. And to make it worse, their captors were making fun of them. "C'mon guys, sing us a song. You know, one of the ones about your great city." Positively depressing. How on earth can you sing about how good God is, when your world is caving in around you? 1000 years later, another Hebrew named Paul sat in a cold dark prison cell, far away from his home and his friends, and wrote the words "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" You see, being able to rejoice has nothing at all to do with the circumstances you are in. It depends on the God you trust. TESTIMONY "I am a single mother of two and when the enemy told me I would die of anxiety and worry I leaned on Psalms 27:1" The Lord is my light and my salvation whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life of whom shall I be afraid?" God has met my needs and I know that my Saviour is there for me. He has revealed himself to me and I am joyful beyond measure that both of my children are born again! I have a long way to go toward maturity but with grace and mercy on my side I cannot go wrong. I want to encourage all single mothers. Jesus is your help! My son is saved and my daughter sings songs to the Lord all the time. I still have some hard times financially, but the Lord is always there." Cheryl. PRAYER CORNER ** Praise God that He is so great that He can make us sing in this "foreign land" we call earth. ** Thank God for His goodness in sending His Son to give us the assurance that we have nothing to fear from life or death (Romans 8:35-39) ** Thank God for the opportunity the Scarcellas had to visit brothers and sisters in Bali, Indonesia. Thank God for the encouragement given and received. ** Pray for the Balinese Christian church, which is small but faithful. Pray for them as they seek to live out their faith in a country often torn apart by ethnic and religious struggles. Pray also for Christians in other parts of Indonesia, especially the Maluku Islands(Ambon),East Java and the capital city Jakarta, where there are still troubles and hardship. ** Pray for the 75 (or more!) children who are settling into the orphanages in Bali after the end of year holidays. Pray for the staff as they settle them in. Pray for patience and an outpouring of God's love. ** Pray for Ben Adelman (17yo) fighting a rare and aggressive abdominal cancer. His big sister Michelle asks you to pray for the medical staff, and for complete healing for Ben. Her email address is mailto:adelmic@hotmail.com ** Keep Sue's mum in your prayers. With rehabilitation, she is now able to stand with support, and she has regained some movement in both legs. She is feeling much more positive. ** Lynn D and Gina L are in the last month of their pregnancies. HAHAHA CORNER With the Olympics coming up in Sydney shortly, there must be a lot of questions people have about Australia... questions some wish had never been asked! LOLOL ***Here are some of the classic questions that were asked of the Sydney Olympic Committee via their Web site, and answers supplied where appropriate. Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK) A: Upwards, out of the ground, like the person who asked this question, who themselves will need watering if their IQ drops any lower... Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA) A: Depends on how much beer you've consumed... Q: Which direction should I drive - Perth to Darwin or Darwin to Perth - to avoid driving with the sun in my eyes? (Germany) A: Excellent question, considering that the Olympics are being held in Sydney. Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden) A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, so you'll need to have started about a year ago to get there in time for this October... Q: Are there any ATMs in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK) Q: Where can I learn underwater welding in Australia? (Portugal) Q: Do the camels in Australia have one hump or two? (UK) Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK) A: Why bother? Use your fingers like the rest of us... Q: Do you have perfume in Australia? (France) A: No. Everybody stinks. Q: Do tents exist in Australia? (Germany) A: Yes, but only in sporting supply stores, peoples' garages, and most national parks... Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? (UK) A: This HAS to have been asked by a blonde... Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France) A: Yes. At Christmas. Q: Can I drive to the Great Barrier Reef? (Germany) A: Sure, if your vehicle is amphibious. Q: Are there killer bees in Australia? (Germany) A: Not yet, but we'll see what we can do when you get here. Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA) A: What's this guy smoking? Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany) A: Another blonde? Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA) A: I love this one...there are no rattlesnakes in Australia. Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA) A: Face North and you should be about right. Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA) A: Americans have long had considerable trouble distinguishing between Austria and Australia. Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA) Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross. Can you help? (USA) Q: Will I be able to speek English most places I go? (USA) A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first. --submitted by Jennie Graham ** Let's have another swipe at poor ol' Bill Gates...LOL When Bill Gates died, he went up to Heaven, where Saint Peter showed him to his house; a beautiful 20 room house, with grounds and a tennis court. Bill Gates was pleased, and spent many months enjoying the amenities of Heaven. One day, he was enjoying one of Heaven's many fine parks, when he ran into a man dressed in a fine tailored suit. "That is a nice suit, my friend," said Gates. "Where did you get it?" "Actually," the man replied, "I was given a hundred of these when I got here. I've been treated really well. I got a mansion on a hill overlooking a beautiful valley, with a huge five-hundred acre estate, a golf course, and three Rolls Royces." "Were you a Pope, or a doctor healing the sick?" asked Gates. "No," said his new friend, "Actually, I was the captain of the Titanic." Hearing this made Gates so angry that he immediately stalked off to find St. Peter. Cornering Peter, he told him about the man he had just met, saying, "How could you give me a paltry new house, while you're showering new cars, a mansion, and fine suits on the Captain of the Titanic? I invented the Windows operating system! Why does he deserve better??!!!!" "Yes, but we use Windows," replied Peter, "and the Titanic only crashed once." --submitted by Liam McEneaney **TOP TEN REASONS WHY DOGS ARE BETTER PETS THAN CATS: 1. Dogs will tilt their heads and try to understand every word you say. Cats will ignore you and take a nap. 2. Cats look silly on a leash. 3. When you come home from work, your dog will be happy and lick your face. Cats will still be mad at you for leaving in the first place. 4. Dogs will give you unconditional love until the day they die. Cats will make you pay for every mistake you've ever made since the day you were born. 5. A dog knows when you're sad. And he'll try to comfort you. Cats don't care how you feel, as long as you remember where the can opener is. 6. Dogs will bring you your slippers. Cats will drop a dead mouse in your slippers. 7. When you take them for a ride, dogs will sit on the seat next to you. Cats have to have their own private basket, or they won't go at all. 8. Dogs will come when you call them. And they'll be happy. Cats will have someone take a message and get back to you. 9. Dogs will play fetch with you all day long. The only thing cats will play with all day long are small rodents or bugs, preferably ones that look like they're in pain. 10. Dogs will wake you up if the house is on fire. Cats will quietly sneak out the back door. --submitted by Chris Foley ************************************************************ Sue: "Hey Rocco, look at Kitty.. she's playing with the modem cable ... that's so cute..." Rocco: "No Kitty... stop that... don't pull that cable or it'll disconne...